Ok well I think we have a possible broadway star on our hands. Shelby had her big third grade program and it was so amazing. They did such a good job. Ok well on with the memories- Dan used to wake up on the weekends with the girls and their favorite game was muscle man- they would tease him and call him muscle woman and then he would chase them untill he caught them and then say "I'm not muscle woman, I'm muscle man!" and then he would throw them on the bed. They would all just laugh and laugh. Merry Christmas!!!!

ok this one's for Jackie

Alright apparently my last posting was a little angry so I am going to spread some holiday cheer or well at least some good news . Shelby got baptized and might I add with no problems yea!!!! Also I decided in order to get through the holiday without my husband I am going to help myself by sharing memories of happier times in order to help keep his memory alive. So here ya go: I remember the first Christmas that Shelby actually was fun probably around 3 years old. Dan woke up at four thirty in the morning and then woke me up and said that I better get up or I was going to miss everything so I jumped out of bed me being the morning person that I am- LOL- woke up and woke Shelby up cause Dan was waiting downstairs so he could see the look on her face. We came downstairs and she was so tired that there was hardly any excitment I felt so bad cause he was so excited- Santa had got her a big ball pit and I don't think she even went in it for an hour.
His favorite color was blue, favorite food lasagne, he wrestled and played football in high school, he likes rock and country- probably country more, he always wished he would have tried out for a college football team and his pet peeve was people who wore socks with sandals, and he loved to people watch and wonder like they were like at home. I had nine great years with this great man who taught me to get over my fear of the water and taught me compassion for people and to not be so judgmental and when I would complain about people and the little things that would hurt my feelings he would say "Life is way to short to hold on to and be so upset over something so dumb- just wasted emotion". I am gratefull to be alive and to get to do what I need to do so we can be sealed together forever as a family. I have a family hear on earth, they are so good to me. I want to share my life with them through all eternity. Families can be together forever through heavnly fathers plan..... Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

Stupid people

Today I am writting all about stupid people, and I think we all know a few. You know the people who pretend to be inocent yet cause all the problems, people who make rude insensitive comments yet never apologize. People who pretend to be your friend, yet don't have a friendly bone in their body. Anyone who doesn't know my husband recently died and I have had the "privelidge" of having some of the rudest comments made to me and around me for example: "I could only declutter if my husband died" or how are you dealing with this so well- I would be a wreak.
I am not dealing with this well-or at all for that matter I am just trying to get by. There are going to be days I don't want to talk about what happened, not because I don't care but because I am tyring to mourn and deal with the fact I have to get not just myself but my kids through Christmas and the rest of our lives without the man we though would be with us forever. So, I for one realizing what I am going through have realized that other people could be going through there own set of trials am going to vow and ask everyone else to think before you talk and spread a little cheer and happiness. Thank you and Merry Christmas.

Trying to find the light

As the time goes on and we draw closer to the holidays and the sadness of having to face them without my husdand I find it harder to want to get up in the morning and see anything good or positive in my life right now. I know I have great friends and my parents have been remarkable but the biggest piece of my heart is gone.So, I ask of all of you both who know me and those who dont please just say a little prayer for me, heaven only knows I will need them to get through this. If I seem distant please forgive me If I seem sad just give me a hug.
I am trying really hard to do some positive things for my girls so they can get through. I just completed and ordered Daddy books full of memories and pictures of them and their dad through snapfish- they have great idea's for all of us creativly challenged people out there. My dad is also helping me make them a movie with pictures and music for them as well. I think I am headed in the right direction. Anyway I am going to post some pictures of Dan so enjoy...

Did you Know?

Today I went and picked up my late husbands medical records and what I found made me sick. First of all he admitted to his "doctor" i'd like to call him something else-anyway he admited to having no interest in life in August of this year. He also admited to being depressed with all the pain from his back and how much it was affecting his life. So, the doctor sends him out the door with a perscription for meds and no follow up and says good luck. Hmm.....
Did you know that every 16 minutes in the U.S someone commits suicide- 33,000.0 people a year. Unfortunatly this is a subject people don't want to talk about, but it needs to be talked about.
If you have a loved one that takes anxiety or depression pills have they read the warning labels? Do they have some type of follow-up with their doctor scheduled? If not they should...... I lost my husband and my dear friend to this and don't ever want anyone else to have to experience the pain I feel and my dear friend is feeling. This has forever changed my life and my kids and if I can help but one person than I will. Thank you

trying to pick myself up....

Well I am totall mental mush. I know have gotten through all the things that have to be taken care of and now I am just trying to pack of my life and wow I didn't think it would be this hard. I guess you do get a lot of junk after nine years together. The hardest part is thinking I should be moving with him not because he is gone. This week I am going to return to work and I forsee it being difficult for the first couple of days- the every day things I am used to like our eleven and one thirty phone conversations that will not be there. The girls are doing ok they seem to bounce back pretty good. This has made me realize just how precious life is- I will never take for granted what I have cause even though he isn't here I still have the two best parts of him left.

Today

Well, I have now gotten through what I forsee as being the most difficult thing that I will ever have to go through. As the week progresses all I can think of is all the happy times we had together: camping, boating, swimming, vacations, fourwheeling and sooooo much more. I remember when I was in the hospital getting ready to deliver our first daughter Shelby and the nurse came in the room and I asked her if she had seen my husband and she said no I don't think so, but there is a guy in the halls with a diaper bag and car seat walking up and down asking all the nurses if he looked like a dad yet. Just then Dan walks in the room and the nurse said oh it's your husband! That was and is him-the best husband and father in the world. Hew worked two jobs the first year we were married so we could get our house before Shelby was born so we didn't have to bring home a new baby to an apartment.
I suppose one day I will feel ok again, but for today I am sad, confused and have sooo much support but feel soooo alone. Dan was is and always will be my best friend and soul mate.

my sorrow

I am writting in the midst of having to deal with something no one should ever have to go through. I lost my husband this last weekend and in and through all this I have learned a lot. I will see Dan again and he will help me get through this. I am a much stronger person than I gave myself credit for. I have the best part of Dan still with me-Shelby and Shaylee. And finally: Don't hold on to any petty thing cause at the end of the day and with all this crap we fret and stress over guess what? None of that really matters. Dan- I love you and just know that I will do what I need to do so that I will hold you and hug you and get to spend forever with you. I love you, your wife, Elizabeth Shaw

Quirks

Tagged by Sarah
Definition of a Quirk:n.1. A peculiarity of behavior; an idiosyncrasy:2.an unpredictable or anaccountable act or event; a vagary: a quirk of fate.
"Every Man has his own quirks and twists" Harriet Beecher Stowe

Rules: Link the person who tagged you. Mention rules on your blog. Tell 6 quirks about yourself. Tag six fellow bloggers to do the same. Leave a comment to let them know.
1. You will never see me wear socks with sandles.I can't handle it socks with sandles is gross!
2.Killing spiders- at home I always either spray them or vacuum them up- I can't handle that crunching noise -yuck!
3. Bath Water- I always fill up the bath-then get in. I usually fold laundry while waiting for it to fill up- I hate wasting time waiting for it to fill up.
4. DVR- I don't watch live tv now. If a show I like is on right now I will record it and then fast forward through it - I hate commercials.
5. Solicitors- I am very straight forward with them- if I wanted a product I would go and buy it myself and I don't beat around the bush and get their hopes up like my husband does I just say NO!!!!
6. I am always cold- even in the summer sitting in the movies I have to take a jackert cause I get cold so easy.

I tag: Jackie- Sorry I don't know alot of people who blog yet.

Hunting fever

Alright well today is the day better for Christmas for Dan- well I should say it is his Christmas. He is gone Elk hunting for 5 days. Oh boy, not my idea of fun but he lives for this time of the year. Although it is good girl bonding time for me and the girls so I won't compain.

Answers-yeah!

Well we went to the neorosurgeon today and finally got some answers. Dan has a bulging herniated disk. The surgeon doesn't want to rush right into surgery so we are going to try an epideral steroid injection to try and release the pressure first, if that does not work then within a week we would know due to the pain returning and at that point we would schedule surgery. The surgery is outpatient and the recovery time is minimul. So....very good news today! Thanks to everyone who has expressed concern for us during this time.

Allright-I confess

Ok I confess I do love the snow- well to a certain point. I think everyone in Utah will agree we all hope we don't get as much snow as last year- well except for those snowplow dealers. Anyways here are some more fun pictures the elk at the bottom of the page is up in Rulon Jones area and the stud waterskiing is Dan-sweet hu? He is almost as good as me!!! Ha Ha-I won't even go out of the wake. Oh well maybe some day!

Make a Smilebox greeting

Fall Finally

Well let me just say that this cooler weather is sooo nice! I just don't know how Jackie(my sis) does it in that hot weather. My mom and Dad and Sister and family are all getting back from getting to see my favorite aunt and uncle in California- I am so jelous. Hopefully we can get Dan through his surgery and save up enough to get to see them next year.
Not a whole heck of a lot going on right now just glad that the weather is now cool and you don't sweat going out to your mailbox- ya know? Well I will let everyone know what happens when we see the neorosurgeon on Tuesday.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Dooms Day

Well Tuesday is coming fast....now and it is about time. In case you don't know Dan hurt his back and has to have surgery and Tuesday is the day we finally after 3 months wait get into the neorosurgen. He has gradually been getting worse and worse so we will both be glad to finally get some answers.
I am glad though cause he does get to do his favorite thing before cut cut snip snip happens-next weekend he gets to go Elk Hunting with a really good friend. Shelby and Shaylee are getting soooo big- time flies when your having fun. They are in soccer and doing really good at it to. I am just holding on to the seat of my pants waiting to see what life will throw me next.

2008

2008 a new year and so much to look forward too. Dan has been at his new job for almost 5 months now. He is really getting used to it and I think actually enjoying going to work? Work for me is the same as always- lots to do and not enough time to do it all. Shelby and Shaylee are both doing really good and growing up to fast. Hope all finds you all well and we will type again soon.